todae is my 1st time

Sunday, July 24, 2005
todae is my 1st time that i woke up at 11am...break my record...i nv slept later than that...then ate breakfast...had a slice of cake...yummy...then watch tv...then Ling and Shi Hua sms me say that they cant go out le...so didnt go out...was sort of disappointed but nvm...everytime wanna go out then they cant go out...and is that everytime i ask wan they cant go...but nvm i'm not angry...so dun be guilty...is jus that i'm hating myself...then after watching tv, did my journal...and i finished my homework...this is the 1st time i so fast finish homework...quite gratified...then practice organ...sick man...i now find that the jazz song is even difficult than Voyager...but there are more to come...i think that teacher is gonna give us a song in 2 weeks time...die liao...how am i gonna pass my grade 6...then jus now almost out of control...almost shout out at my parents and was feeling furious...cos of some things...then they decided not to but organ le...i waited for so long le but it jus does not come true...i doubt that they will give me a surprise on my birthday this year...not even a present...nvm...i'm quite contented yet discouraged...

then i dunno why they came back from work then scold me again...i jus cant stand it...then my mother still says if i make her angry another time, then i die lor...but i dun understand...wad haf i done wrong...the organ thing can 4get it cos of some probs that i can understand...but is that they always break my promise lor...then ytd my maths tutor say that if i must try to go for tuition wif my brother on Tues...then is that if i dun go he will be angry...but i feel like going...i got theory at 3:30pm...then go home must study A maths test...but if i go i can revise my A maths rite? however, i go there also no use wad...no matter how much i study will also fail wan and i go there can ask until how many qns...he always explaining to my brother...say until this, i cant stand it...he always say that i dun wanna ask qns...but he explaining to others then how i ask...i ask le i still dun understand...why am i so stupid...



be true to urself
7:39 PM

Saturday, July 23, 2005
todae woke up quite late cos was feeling tired...dunno why...then ate 2 slices of bread for breakfast...do homework...then went for tuition...b4 that, i quarrelled wif my younger brother...who ask him wan to help him do homework but if dun do he beat me lor...i cried cos i said i dun wan than he beat me lor...so i help him do lor...always like that wan...then i slack in tuition lesson...i only done 3 qns or not even 3...for the whole lesson...wad am i doing...and teacher was also quite angry cos he has high expectations of me...he always compare me wif my elder brother...how sad...

then went for organ lesson...todae we learn a new song again...i'm dead man...i still cant play well for Voyager and now come the new song...A Whiter Shade of Pale...it's a jazz song...i think i heard b4 somewhere...then this song is quite difficult but i think Voyager is still the most difficult of all the songs i have played...then i found out that Jun Yan passed his grade 6 but i wonder why he is still learning grade 6 and not for grade 5, teacher's grade? i have regretted learning organ...but i learn anything also no use wna la...slack in everything i learn and do...i wanna pick up Guitar...i have been waiting for a long time to learn liao...but now i'm more concern abt the organ as i have not more than 20 hours for my parents to decide this prob...but dun wan also good...cos i'm lousy...then sch exams are coming soon...so sian...finishing homework...left wif journal...



be true to urself
11:55 PM

Friday, July 22, 2005
todae i went to sch and was okie...i was rather dejected...however i tried to laugh...during eng lesson Yvonne told us something that made me laugh like siao...then Mr Ooi thought that it was someone else who made me laugh...haha...then after sch stayed back to do the speech for Mon...so sian...then after that went home...prepare things and then went for theory...todae's lesson was alrite...then after that went to Queensway...while waiting for bus, a foreigner came and asked me for directions...i was so jovial when she asked me cos i want to help others when i can...however, i'm not sure she got there anot...i hope so...then bought a pair of Nike shoes...at 1st look that time still alrite but buy back le regret...maybe cos of hurry bah...i choose things need a lot of time wan even buying chocolates...siao rite...act lor...i haf changed...i really changed a lot and is from bad to worse...



be true to urself
11:50 PM

Tuesday, July 19, 2005
todae was more relaxing than ytd...however i was late for sch...sick...i think i'm changing bak to my usual self again...i wan to be a better person...i cried like siao ytd...then todae got cry abit...i cant control my feelings...then i was trying to change le but no one believe me...i'm not gonna be late 4eva...i was slacking the past few weeks but now i'm trying my best to do my work...and for wad i do, i must do till the very best...todae's lesson was quite boring...then after sch stayed bak a while to do my reading log as it was raining heavily and i cant go for my music lesson and it also haven start so i decided to accompany Shi Hua also...while we were doing our work outside class, Mr Ooi will sometimes do a check...then there was one time that Mdm Choy walked passed and asked us qns...then i thought she might have forgotten my prob but she didnt...haiz...she asked me sumthing then she went liao...phew!

then went for theory lesson...was late by 10mins but teacher extended the time cos she is free...then i need to "chiong" liao cos she is paying bak 2 more lessons to me and the time given to reach my target is getting closer...i doubt that i can finish my Grade 7 theory by end of year...haiz...see 1st bah...then went home did theory homework then practice organ...then almost shouted at my parents...and i was dejected cos of sumthing...and it was really unreasonable lor...i dunno why they are getting more and more unreasonble...sry to say that and you 2 are my parents lor...and the 2 of you, my brothers...you all can give me some freedom and respect me anot...and dun be so unreasonable or else you all dun force me to do sumthing which i dun wan it to happen...or i may change to an unreasonable person too if you all wan to...



be true to urself
10:58 PM

Sunday, July 17, 2005
todae was slack...woke up and play computer...after that went to meet Ling, Shu Wen and Eliz...we went to Jurong Point...walk walk then Ling wans to eat...after that went to arcade but Shu Wen gotta go for her piano lesson...we played a while then walk walk...then saw many NCC cadets...i remembered that todae they are going to the SATI(i dunno whether spell correctly anot)...then somewhere near there...then we go window shopping until 7plus...then after that when going home that time saw Leslie they all...haiz...i realized sumthing...dun sae le...then when we still waiting for someone then they all go liao...then went home finished my work...



be true to urself
11:00 PM

Saturday, July 16, 2005
todae woke up at 9+...eat breakfast...then do homework...do household chores...then practice organ...then thinking of sum things...then went for organ lesson...i saw notices of the guitar course starting next month...i wanna learn...but my parents wun allow wan lor...if they dun allow then i dun care le...i pay the fees myself lor...i missed so many opportunities le...i have regretted for wasting 2 years learning the keyboard and the teacher wasted half of my year for organ...then todae's lesson was alrite...of all the lessons, todae's is the best of all but not really best...todae i was asked to play "If I never knew you", the disney song at the teacher's organ...i slack man...i can play better last week...then we tried out "Voyager"...i so damn stupid...cant play...left hand was alrite but right hand had some probs when playing...only right hand got prob liao then how i play with both hands? huh?

we also played "ET", "Let it be" and the sort of french song and do hearing also...then Jun Yan played "Magnificent 7" and "Back to the future"...i prefer "Magnificent 7"...he good lor...the pro kia in class...unlike me...he actually taken grade 6 liao but i think he failed so he in this class bah...then i think i the youngest or maybe as the same age as one of them...Cheryl is now in poly/JC or university...then Jun Yan is in Sec 4...the joker's sister got her Grade 6 result...got all Bs and As...then teacher also showed the result of the other pupil of hers...got 2Bs and the rest all As...i wonder how they can get so good results...i think if i sit for the exam...the paper is all C or D...then i had decided to go celebrate wif my mum...we ate Swensen's...then after that had a tiff with my younger brother again...sick lor...everyday must quarrel with me wan lei...if not then...forget it...now i feeling very sick ar...jus now gave attitude to my father...haiz...i haf changed so much...so bad...but i still think i'm on the right side and they are the ones who caused me to be like that...i also dun like it...but they nv noe...i only correct their mistakes than they "bu shuang" le...then i jus now wanted to say sumthing and i say half of my sentence for 7 times b4 i could say wad i wanted to say...and then they didnt even reply me...then still say everytime i dun wanna say...nowadays i dun even talk to my closest SheepSheep abt my feelings...then jus now i almost uncontrol myself cos of sumthing again...



be true to urself
9:36 PM

Friday, July 15, 2005
i was actually feeling alright todae..but things pile up and make me feel confused..that led me to my dispirited world...during morning asembly, a person said abt sumthing then i felt despondent...then went back to class, Mr Ooi was in a bad mood...Ms Lim was talking to Mr Cheong then we all were sort of noisy then Mr Ooi shouted...then todae Ying Yan didnt come...i guessed is abt ytd's prob? Ying Yan cheer up man...we will always be supporting you! then Mr Ooi cos of all these and a guy also told me sumthing and i told myself that cos of others, i must be jovial...they are all feeling despondent so i should be jubilant...i wanna help others but i cant...then after sch went to Ngee Ann Poly for the course...b4 that, i was not feeling good...and went to there, i was laughing like siao...and i had not been laughing for so long...then got some misunderstandings...sry...i think i dun need to say out the name bah...i was the one who was at wrong...then went home when using the computer got scolded by my parents...cos of some misunderstandings again...i talked back to them...i so frustrated and depressed le still like that...then i feel that i'm not going for tml's dinner for my mum's birthday celebration...i dun care whether it is Swensen's or wad so eva...i'm not going...



be true to urself
7:20 PM

Thursday, July 14, 2005
todae i was late again so Shu Wen and i had t take cab again...sry...at 1st i was kinda elated...but slowly, i became discouraged...even more depressed as time goes by...during Chinese lesson, Mdm Tan broke into tears cos she said abt her parents who had passed away...hiax.. despondent...then we had our 2.4km run todae...i think i was placed 4th in class for girls...15.14 min...haix...Shu Wen was the fastest...pro wor...then CME lesson actually got test wan then teacher say we can open the book...during Chemistry, my mood came to the climax for todae...i was rude to Shu Wen and she was sort of angry bah...SORRY!!! then actually should be everyone arnd me who i was rude to...during Eng, Mr Ooi checked our reading log...he dunno say that i read abt Dark Matters? i think is sumthing like that...then my mind was blank...i think i was also rude to him...haix...

after sch Shi Hua they all got oral exam so i did my homework in class while waiting for her...then Mr Ooi asked me some qns...then i only shake or nod my head...then i think it was rude...sry...then when Shi Hua and i went to the music room, they all practice finish liao...haha...then we all went home...Shi Hua and her sis wait for her father to fetch them then i went home myself...i went to the National Library to return and borrow books...then saw Shu Xian and her stead(if i'm not wrong)...waved to her and went to take bus home...i didnt study A maths test as i noe that i will fail...i had been slacking...and not practicing my organ for almost a week le...tml going for the MYOB thing at Ngee Ann Poly...bored...



be true to urself
10:39 PM

Wednesday, July 13, 2005
todae was feeling quite strange...haix...feeling discouraged? or jovial? then todae was an unlucky day...Ms Saw so long time didnt call me do poa then todae so unfortunate got called and i always say index no. 1 very seldom call wan...then carriage inwards can write until carriage outwards...dunno wad am i doin todae...then maths lesson was okie...chinese lesson was okie too...but we needed to compose song lei...not really compose la is kind of changing lyrics...but dunno why almost cried...maybe cos of some reasons...Mr Ooi said abt the oral thing...haix...hopeless is the word to describe it...after sch went home eat lunch then went for tuition...the lesson was boring that i fell alsleep...then everytime tuition ask qns less then 10 sentences...then teacher says i so different from my brother...so sick wan lei...everytime compare between my brothers and i...last week was 2 and a half hours...this week is 2hours...so sian...

came home was very tired that i stare into the space...then 8:30pm then do homework...die liao le...i haven been practicing on my organ for 4 days le...i think gonna slack liao...last time i cant resist myself from playing it as i'm addicted to it but now i'm slacking like dunno wad...i'm gonna get laughter from the people again...and this reminded me of sumthing bad ytd...i will not forget it...FOREVER!!!



be true to urself
11:34 PM

Tuesday, July 12, 2005



be true to urself
1:06 AM

Sunday, July 10, 2005
todae woke up at 9plus...so tiring...then ate breakfast...tasteless wan...do homework...12plus drink a bowl of soup...then Shu Wen came my house...raining...she didnt bring umbrella...then we do homework then she play PS2 then i do homework...then parents came bak...keep on asking me qns...then i quite angry...ask me this and that...finish doing hw le went out to meet Eliz and Ling...we 4 went to Bugis...we walk walk and took neoprints...i look so ugly and sian...then we had a fun time decorating...then went to buy sweets then dunno why Shu Wen and Ling say that if i'm arnd, the shop selling sweets wun closed and etc...then say say say...then went to take a bus home...on the bus, we chatted and we asked each other to guess some songs...cos we were too bored...then went to change bus...Eliz took different bus from us...then dunno who started some joke...then talk talk talk...until we went home...reached home le eat sweets and play organ...the new song wad really difficult...then come online...that's all for my day...



be true to urself
10:57 PM

Saturday, July 09, 2005
todae woke up late at nearly 6:30am...then actually meet Ling they all at 6:45am then Ling and i was late...actually Ling can be earlier de but she say wait for me...lol...thanks...we ate mac and went sch...then went to Clementi to do CIP...our group spilt into 2 again but this time got 2 more sec 1 de...Shu Wen, Shi Hua and I again...then Mr Ooi say cant wan then Shi Hua says we very independent wan then he speechless liao...we went to the first few flats then got one got piles of newspapers...we were shocked and we were half dead le cos too heavy...then got one resident lent us a trolley cos she thought it was too heavy...then i phoned to Mr Ooi then he came over and look after...we were counted as one of the slowest...cos we joke and laugh when doing the collection...haha...enjoyed my time todae but was tired and my finger almost bleed cos of the newspapers...then got lots of chatting and blah blah blah...cant really explain all...then went bak to sch...waited for 3/7 and 3/8 to arrive...went Tiong then only Hui Xian eating...i kept on drinking water todae...dunno why so thristy...todae i had drank 500ml of plain water, 330ml of sprite, a cup of bubble tea and 750ml of vegetable+fruits de drink and now i'm drinking 1 litre of vitasoy...i only ate a burger for breakfast and skip lunch then dinner haf 3 breads maybe cos i ytd only eat breakfast bah...then todae learn a new song...Voyager...the chorus very smoothing...overall 95%...maybe it's another Tsunami song that i haf waited....however, it is more challenging than Tsunami...it is quite difficult as there are many changes in chords, change in speed and its quite fast, right hand quite complicated but maybe a practice a few times then will be easier...i wanna make it another Tsunami...but i think teacher is too fast these few days...give us a new song each week...then how i cope...i die le la...then she todae only gave back me a diskette cos i gave her 3 then her com spoil...



be true to urself
7:44 PM

Friday, July 08, 2005
wanna add to todae's blog...i haf embarrassed myself 3 times todae...one was i dropped my books when coming to sch then my poa file's content page also drop out...it was thorn...then only Shu Wen was around...then the 2 thing was ytd Yee May wore my shoes home then todae in the hall exchanged back then was like...so many ppl then still got teachers arnd...then the 3rd thing was that Shi Hua was asking me abt Sci then i kept on saying that cos it was salt in mandrian then Ms You was behind us then she thought wad...then all of us laugh lor...including Yvonne they all...cos they are taking sweets from me then very funny...then Mdm Tan asked us wad happen then i still laugh...



be true to urself
10:31 PM

todae, sch was boring but Shu Wen and i was really lucky todae...we were almost late...then we didnt do poa then didnt confiscate ezlink card...haha...then Yvonne was angry cos why my card wasnt confiscated but hers...then we were not called for oral...so lucky man...todae we stay back in sch until 3plus cos of poa...then i was sort of feeling furious and disappointed of sum things...haix....then went to theory but teacher didnt come todae...i waited for half an hour cos i went there too early todae then knew that she didnt come...then go home lor...i'm very scared now...tml got organ then dunno wad's gonna happen...i'm scared...but quite depressed of tml also...cos teacher is gonna give me the diskettes for the songs...but...haix...forget it...



be true to urself
8:11 PM

Thursday, July 07, 2005
todae was quite tired...woke up at 6:30am...then todae's lesson was also boring...we ran 4 rounds around sch for PE...then during CME lesson, almost the whole class fell asleep...then Chemistry...haix...then Mr Ooi tested some of them for oral...then they needed to stay back...then we got CO...not more then 20 ppl...so pathetic...then released at 5:30pm...then noticed that Yee May wore my shoes home...then i wore hers...lol...saw Ling they all then we go Tiong...actually dun feel like going cos still got some much homework to do but also dun wanna go home...got home at 8pm then got scolded...but forget it...wad made me angry was that my father kept on asking me to do my work but the prob is that they all keep on chatting and watching TV...then how i do? so noisy...asked them to keep quiet then later noisy again...i was fed up that i shouted at them...haix...i wonder wad's gonna happen tml...hope that tml will be a brighter day...cant be depressed or angry...lets hope bah...



be true to urself
11:59 PM

Tuesday, July 05, 2005
todae went to sch...was Ling's birthday...Happy Birthday!!! sch was quite boring...then eye a bit swollen...then in class Han Jun keep on asking me why i keep on staring in the air...then haix...dun say...then now only Shi Hua and Shu Wen noe my secret..cant tell okie? thanks...but actually nth la...but i feel quite hurt abt it...then during maths lesson cried a bit...haix...Ms Lim says that i got a lot of mistakes for my homework...but i cry not cos of this...shall not say bah...then during PC Mr Ooi showed us the depression thing...then dunno why Shu Wen and Han Jun look at me...i got depression meh? i so happy...haha...then Mr Ooi was sick...haix...more and more ppl getting sick...must invent some chemicals...lol...then after sch went to celebrate Ling's birthday...but hope she dun mind cos not really celebrate...then we late then Shi Hua was kinda angry...then i say that i must also invent more chemicals...but i dun think i can even go to ITE...so slack...we chatted then Shi Hua not angry liao...then Shu Wen said the truth to Shi Hua...at 1st i was kinda worried cos i tried to help her keep the secret then Shi Hua says she was not angry...i hope so bah...i noe lying is a big offence but i dun wan anything bad to happen...SORRY!!! NEXT TIME I WILL NOT LIE TO YOU ALL LE OKIE??? then i was playing the organ jus now...so disappointed wif myself...play like shit...then all the sad songs became like ppl dying de songs...then i now confused and frustrated wif sum things...



be true to urself
11:21 PM

Monday, July 04, 2005
todae is the 1st time that i break record...i woke up at 11am...eat breakfast cum lunch...then do journal...then Shu Wen came to my house...then she played computer while i'm rushing to finish my journal...then i influence her to cars...haha...then we kept on research for cars then forgotten the time then late for meeting Eliz they all...sry...got Eliz, Shi Hua, Emily, Ling, Shu Wen and me...at 1st, Shi Hua and i walked away wif them cos i was feeling frustrated...i cant control my temper...then i kept on saying of going to die when Shi Hua kept on asking me where am i going...then after cooling down myself, we meet wif them then we go Orchard...then on our way to the bus stop, we saw Leslie they all...haix...i almost cried...dunno why...then we waited for another bus...then go Cineleisure as Shu Wen wans to eat pastamania...but on the way, i cried cos of sumthing...only Shu Wen noes...haha...dun say out ok? thanks...then went to Heeren...was quite sian...then walk walk...eat ice cream then went home...then reach home le went for tuition...was quite disappointed yet jovial...was feeling irritated cos my eyes was quite pain...then did ss project...



be true to urself
11:40 PM

Sunday, July 03, 2005
todae woke up at 10...was feeling quite pain and sorrowful...then 12 plus eat lunch...practice organ again...the new song was rather slow...but i cant play well...then went to the car show...so sian wan...the cars not that good...still okie la...then nth wan...last year's at Suntec the motorshow 2004 was better...then went there that time something bad happen again...came back also happen again...then almost cried...haix...now still in pain...then todae wasnt a good day...i almost talked back to my dad...cos he was so "fan"...i dunno how la...he says gonna bring us to Hong Kong at end of year but i was rather disconsolate...and cos of some things...i think i shall end here...



be true to urself
9:31 PM

Saturday, July 02, 2005
todae woke up at 9plus...then use computer...then my elder brother play PS2...then i found out that i'm so stupid...my brothers lie to me...then i practice my organ...i found out that my elder brother lie to me another time...they good lor...make me so sad...still laugh at me...then eat a burger for lunch and went for tuition...then got a guy join...he is Jun Hao's friend...then he good lor...got his friend liao then change liao...i make a mistake wad then his friend laugh then he also laugh...i feel disappointed abt it...then actually i still got some qns abt sch work wan to asked wan then didnt asked cos they will laugh again...so sad le still adding sadness to it...then went to organ lesson...but b4 that went to buy diskettes for the organ...todae learn a new song titled "If i nv knew you"...it is another disney song again...then todae the 1 whole hour playing songs...luckily no impro or hearing...i was asked to play "Time to say goodbye" again...i was sort of confident cos i practiced it in the morning but the result turned out to be far from expected...i was playing faster than the tempo that i miss count...then my chords and melody also played wrongly...i was quite disappointed wif it...such a stupid person...then went to meet Shi Hua after that cos we going to watch Ngee Ann Poly Chinese Orchestra performing at Singapore Conference Hall...then went on smoothly then after that was abt 10pm...then went to eat dinner wif Siti cos Shi Hua's father fetching Xin Rui, her sister and her home...but during the concert, Shi Hua talked to me but i didnt ans...so sorry...then i came home at 11...something made me cried and i was even sadder...then todae was not a good day for me...how abt tml? i wonder how...



be true to urself
11:19 PM

Friday, July 01, 2005
todae went to sch feeling elated cos of some reasons...then the day in sch was so boring esp Chemistry...i dun understand much of wad the new teacher is talking...she is also called Ms Chan...she slang like veri wad then talk quite soft and teach so fast...i dun even noe wad chemical is wad...then falling sleepy...i think i todae eat a lot...recess eat wif Shi Hua, Shu Wen, Mei Fang and Sandra...but Sandra not eating...then afternoon drink a cup of water...then dinner eat 3 breads...then now mother so called force me to eat one more again...we went for CIP then quite suay or wad that Mr Ooi is in our group la...then Mei Yee and Han Jun go wif Mr Ooi then Shi Hua, Shu Wen and i split from them but got 1 time we 3 laugh quite loud then Mr Ooi heard it...then all of us go different blocks...we 3 finish the papers le then meet wif Mei Yee and took more...then we went back to our work that time saw Mr Ooi again...then we finish everything liao...then Shi Hua said that why dun i tell her earlier but i say i got...then i mood swing again...haix cos of sum reasons...but Shi Hua, i'm not angry wif you jus now...dun keep it to mind...then we met they all then walk back to the MRT station there...then went back to sch...after that we went to Tiong...haix...i naughty gal again...didnt go theory lesson todae cos i late liao then feeling moody and tired...chatted wif Shi Hua, Shu Wen, Mei Fang, Ling and Hui Xian...but Hui Xian and Ling didnt talk much...then after that go home...



be true to urself
7:16 PM

todae mood swing

Thursday, June 30, 2005
todae mood swing or should i say is almost everyday...todae take Shu Yun's father car to sch...actually dun feel like taking cos she hates me to the core but Shu Wen they all say nvm then forget it...then sumthing make me angry and agitated...Mr David Tan asked me which instrument i play then i told him organ then he go liao...then he asked Qi You then he says he play piano then Mr Tan asked him to prepare a song for solo performance...then i feel that maybe cos i'm stupid or he bias or he look down on ppl who plays organ...maybe he look down on ppl who play the organ cos organ is easier to play than piano...you see, so stupid rite...haha...then i dunno wad to say le...feel like chatting wif sumone but...forget it...maybe cos of this thing, i may give up the MEP bah...i dunno...then maybe Jaryl calling tml...but i dunno wad to say...



be true to urself
6:48 PM

Wednesday, June 29, 2005
haix...since sch reopen, i'm so happi...cos of too many things...i think i cant make it for 'O' levels...i dunno anything for studies...haha...todae also very ecstatic...then todae got photo taking for CO...then heard that we are gonna perform wif Ngee Ann primary for the Hong Kong ppl...then if we do well, we maybe can go Hong Kong next year...haha...but jus now ask my dad abt the trip to England then he angry liao...i wonder wat is in his mind...then i think i 'O' levels finish liao either go poly or immediately go overseas study...but i'm so stupid how to go overseas study...i dun think my dad and mum will pay for me lor...btw jus now Jaryl called...but quite sad...then i'm now so confused...then my parents haven even tell me how abt the organ thing or i think they didnt think of it...then my cousins win liao lor...all lie to me...then Calvin korkor and Cheryl jiejie also dun wanna talk to me...so disappointed...work liao like this lor...got girlfriend liao like this lor...live in a private house le like this lor...my dad didnt keep his promise too...still buy 4D...i hate it to the core...i feel like giving up the wish that he wanted me to fufill for him...but all of them are like that...i promise and try to fulfill wad they wan but they didnt keep it...i haf realised many things since sch reopen...esp that i'm getting more stupid...then still got some that make me angry...shall i say? then tml is the opening of DreamCars Asia motorshow 2005...i'm gonna go man...last year's was quite cool...but this year has more cars that like...but i tml no time, friday no time, sat also then must sun go lor...but...haix forget it...



be true to urself
10:56 PM

Saturday, June 25, 2005
todae woke up at 8plus...then skip breakfast...do poa and eng...then do finish poa at 12pm then wash living room de fan...then cook lunch...instant noodles again...then sweep floor and watch tv...after that do eng again then parents come bak...then we went to Suntec city...shop shop wif my aunt and her friends...then bought some stuffs but cost my dad $200 plus...but if i buy a digital camera then even worse...i had been eying on it for quite a long time...one of my dream was to become a photograher...but now i'm eying to be a chemist or an optometrist or psychologist or nephrologist...haix...so greedy rite...lol...sian...then tml would be a better day if it doesnt rain cos i'm gonna go sumwhere where there's sumthing i like it man...car freak...



be true to urself
9:31 PM

Friday, June 24, 2005
ytd go watch Initial D wif Shi Hua, Eliz, Ling and Shu Wen...the show okie la...quite funny...but too bad i dun quite like the cars...but ytd after the show, Shi Hua and I kept on looking out for sports cars on the road...we went to Bugis after the show at arnd 6plus...then after going Bugis street, we walk to Bugis junction then we saw 2 Hyundai Tuscani...haha...but seen quite often in Singapore...then at 1st i always see this car but i dunno wad brand it was...then ytd still dunno wad brand but i remembered that i saw that in a car magazine...but i haf no confidence in myself...haix...i'm so stupid...cant remember which model is which...do research and look magazine also useless wan...no money cant but also useless wan...cos i stupid wad...ppl look at it 1 glance will noe wad car it is but me must stare at it for so long then noe...so stupid...haha...then we went to walk walk in Bugis...then after that went to Esplanade...my sickening brother kept on asking where i was...then wad time i go home...dunno why eveytime must ans his ans and give him the specific place and time...then went to the seaside there then got sumone's birthday...then there got lightsticks written "HAPPY BITRHDAY!" wif her name and then still got cake...haix...say until birthday ar...i'm still confused over the chalet thing...then i stare at the sea...thinking of all my problems...almost cried out but didnt la...then Shi Hua wan to take photo wad then i dun wan cos i'm so damn ugly and no mood...actually i'm the one who talk the most ytd...i guess...but until that time, all of us became moody cos of me bah...haix...everytime cos of me...at 1st is Shi Hua sad sad wan, then is Eliz then is me...haix...actually i tried to be HAPPY all day to break my record but i cant...but nvm...todae dunno wad's gonna happen cos ytd reach home at abt nearly 10pm then my parents and elder brother angry but this is not my latest time to get home wad...then i ytd at home cried lor...but no one noes...haha...btw, Thank You Eliz and Shu Wen for the Famous Amos biscuits...thanks...and SORRY Ling that i shldnt ask you the qn ytd...and also SORRY everyone...



be true to urself
8:44 AM

Friday, June 17, 2005
wed jus came back from Malaysia...then ytd needed to go CO...so tired...dunno why...at Genting still okie la...saw Xin Rui twice...and saw my pri sch friend, Hui Hong once...then saw a gal who look alike like my godsis, Cassandra...then i thought that the person was her but dun think so cos her mother was there...then notice that she was not her...then at Genting there play arcade that time got some guys 'di siao' wan...got 1 guy quite good and quite nice looking sia...he helped me wif the game but when i play finish already, he was gone...haix...now my heart also very complicated...i dunno whether still have any feelings for *him* anot...what if i say that i nv like him? i dunno what happen to me...now my heart dun haf any feelings at all for anyone...i cant feel it...y? am i too heartless...but when we come back, i cried...cos of my parents...my dad said that he will buy lesser TOTO, 4D and shares...but that's all lies...after he said finish, he immediately called his cousin to help him buy the shares cos his cousin is working at the shares there...then still called his good friend to buy 4D for him...speechless...then my mum 'gin' at me when at the custom there cos she asked me to cut other ppl's q...but then why so kiasu and it's not good to cut other ppl's q...dunno why lei...i sumtimes also cut other ppl's q but that day think differently...haix...then CO also not many ppl go wad...then today got LCCI...so boring and got so many qns to do...die liao...then later still got to go for theory lesson...then surely got homework to do wan...tml still got organ lesson then still haven practice...liao le la...so many things to do...



be true to urself
2:44 PM

Monday, June 13, 2005
ytd use computer for a while then suddenly shut down...haix...really spoil liao...and i was still frustrated cos of some probs...haix...i cant contorl my anger...and btw, i'm truly sry everyone...i made everyone hate me and made you all sad...you see...i'm not a good gal...not obedient, not filial, stupid, useless, dont care abt other ppl's thoughts...not a human at all...cant even compare wif a pig...then todae went to Genting...sian...but at least still better than the past...but not as happy as wad i expected...my dad still got play bowling, arcade and archery wif us and walk walk lor...but my mother and my aunt and my dad's employee go gamble...sick...my mother says she headache then still got and gamble...then now, all alone using com and i was quite hapi yet sad jus now...the younger kids still playing the com wad then a guy help me to ask them whether is that com theirs...then they went away liao...btw...thanks...i'm hapi cos of this but sad cos of this also...i think i shld not elaborate more as i may be more sad...tml going KL bah...sian lei...btw, SORRY Hui Ying, Eliz, Shu Wen, Ling Ling, Shi Hua, and every single soul in the universe...i such a...forget it...or else later i need to run away from ppl again...haha...i think only Shi Hua and/or Shu Wen shld noe bah...but really SORRY!!!



be true to urself
10:38 PM

Saturday, June 11, 2005
so bored...ytd helped my mum from 8am to 7pm...then very tired...todae only helped from 8am to 12:30pm...then a few days b4 i got went and help and i was shocked that my dad increase my pay again...since abt pri 5 help till now...increase my pay for the 3rd time...but not much...then he keep on asking me wan to book chalet anot...but i dunno wad's the name...stupid man...i went b4 but forgot...quite ex wan...then i was pissed off todae...my aunt and my brothers...my aunt always snatch away my job...like my grandmother...then my brothers...always so sickening wan...always act infront of my parents and other ppl then at their back act bad...sumtimes really good but most of the times are bad...i dunno how i'm feeling now...my feelings are all mixed up...then thursday got CO wad...i 10am then reach there...i actually dun wan to go wan...then go lor...then reach there Siti got call my name la...but i was feeling quite angry so i didnt reply her...then i cant find my Er Hu in the store room wad then i got even frustrated...then took the music stand liao stand outside the music room dun wan to go in...cos I feel that I'm like transparent to them...then went in liao found my Er Hu cos the Sec 1 guy took it...then they learn new song liao...i dunno wad so i see and hear how they play then follow them play lor...since i'm the world's stupiest, idoiticest, ugliest, failurest and slackiest person...i shall grant vanish from this world...some ppl lie to me that i haf a bright future ahead..but it's not true...



be true to urself
1:42 PM

Tuesday, June 07, 2005
todae went to LCCI then after that went out wif Shu Wen and ling...actually i went to Shu wen's house 1st then we too bored den go out...went bowling...i slack or should i say that is i'm so stupid...only got 77...haix...slack...then went to eat dinner...then went walk a while then go home...dunno whether isit sad or hapi...then reach home...mum and dad haven come home...then watch tv and do poa...after that stare into space...dun wan to do poa le...no mood to do...



be true to urself
11:23 PM

few days didnt write blog le...2 days ago went oout wif Shu Wen and Eliz...then saw a yellow Lamborghini Murcielago...cool man...1st time in my life for almost 15 years that i saw one...i wan it...or a Ferrari Enzo...but too bad...no chance...then todae went LCCI again...so boring...but next Wed not going cos in Malaysia...i hope that the trip to Malaysia would be fun...cos my dad's friends are going wif their children but only 1 or 2 are girls bah...then others are guys...then abt my age...hope to make friends wif them or else i will be lonely at there again...haix...cos my aunt also going then she surely stick wif my mum wan lor...then actually todae going to meet Estelle wan but change date le...then ytd Qian Hui sms me whether wan to go for a talk on Sat but actually dunno they 2 much...but hope to meet up they 2 to noe more abt each other cos i wan to make more friends...but say until make friends ar...my grandmother's birthday coming then maybe Calvin korkor and his girlfriend, Wendy got go...and i hope that they go...btw...Calvin is also known as Wen Loong...my cousin which i had a crush on him last time but now not...Susanne jie, can meet you up and you must go to my birthday chalet ok? as well as, Cassandra meimei, Calvin korkor and Wendy jiejie ok?



be true to urself
1:57 PM