todae is the end of year for eng

Friday, September 30, 2005
todae is the end of year for eng...hope that i can at least get a B4 for overall...wish bah...feeling sad...i surely fail badly wan...if not then a mere pass...todae learn new topic for theory...hope to take grade 8 theory and grade 6 pract by next year june if not i can take pract 1st by march...i only wish to focus more on my studies now...i neglected on my studies for years...i didnt put in a single effort in my studies or should i say is everything...haiz...
be true to urself
11:17 PM
Thursday, September 29, 2005
todae was feeling quite despondent...cos of many things...but i thought for a very long time le...i wish that i could haf another chance so that i can make up my mistakes...i cant forget abt the MEP pract on mon...i starting was too fast le but i try to slow down then cant...while playing, i noe i made lots of mistakes and i noe where i stand...i made the most mistakes on my pedals...then i almost cry...then Mr Lee asked me to play some parts of other songs for him to listen so that he can tell me what to play for the 'O' levels...i haf chosen the wrong song this time...actually not really wrong la is cos the tempo is moderate...then he ask me to choose one that is slow and one fast for 'O' levels...it may be a big challenge to me cos my organ does not really haf the function for the tempo...and i would always play faster than the original of the fast song or slower when the song is slow...like The Entertainer that i played for months b4 going for exams last grade...but then it is always like this wan lei...i practice real hard and well wan rite, the examiners dun choose it and choose those which i play only recently...then i also think that i'm too selfish cos i wan a new organ but then it costs quite a lot...if i every week book a studio, i will eventually broke...the non-peak hours also need $10.50 for an hour...and i pay it using my pocket money...i still owe my brother $100 over dollars and $80 over dollars to my dad...still need save up for overseas studies + overseas trip, organ exam, MEP and many many more...then Jason Sien sms agian...i thought that he wun sms le cos it's nearly a month since he last call and sms me...but todae he asked me wanna meet him anot...i'm now confused...tml is Eng enf of year le...jus hope that i can do well for all the subjects this time...
be true to urself
9:23 PM
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
I'm officially 15 todae...actually quite despondent but also jubilant...so sad cos my closest cousin who will without fail at least sent me a greeting and give me a present every year...maybe cos of my father and my uncle's misunderstandings bah...but very grateful to you all...esp Shi Hua, Eliz, Ling, Shu Wen, Shu Yun, Mei Fang, Hui Xian and many more...thanks for all the greetings...presents and the cake...i haf waited for years but that wish will nv fulfil...
be true to urself
8:16 PM
Sunday, September 25, 2005
i was actually quite jovial the past 2 days cos of some improvements in my music...both theory and pract...but then i'm quite scared of tml's MEP pract...i surely out of beat wan lor...nvm...jus wish myself good luck...must haf more confidence...then todae went out wif Shu Wen and we went to the Central Lending Library...go up every floor...had a great time...then went to the Mac nearby...taught each other a and e math...did my poa...and speech...then i call my dad asking if they are going out to eat or wad...then we went to Tiong and i bought a slice of Black forest cake for my dad as it was his birthday todae...jus wanna say that though i hated you for some time, you are still my dad and i'm sry for was i haf done...anyways, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! i cant really promise that i can fulfil your dream as it is really to my extent that you cant force me to study wad i dun really like and haf to act infront of all my peers, cousins, uncles, aunts and etc. that i really like to study that particular course in poly....however, you are still my dad...then i came home saw no one at home...my illusion tells me that they are out for dinner...i'm worried that he wun eat that cake and i will be angry...they are not gonna celebrate my birthday for sure...last year still scolded me on my birthday...wad can i do...i cant scold them...nvm...
be true to urself
7:06 PM
Sunday, September 11, 2005
ytd went to help my parents at their stall...it's been 2 months since i last help them and a customer was not very happy abt my service...i added the toppings that she wanted but then that is the most i can add for her...or else i will be sacked by my dad...the ingredients for the food need money also lei...then forget it...worse one was being sort of scolded at last time...then went home by myself...until 4plus went for organ lesson...i was quite despondent cos i was being asked to play Lawrence of Arabia on the teacher's organ...i didnt practice at home so went there only noe how to play rite hand and pedal...then the other guy played very well...then teacher checked on our playing of part a to the chorus there on each of us...actually it's not that difficult...but it jus needed some time...then we also played Whiter shade of pale, Voyager, Final Fantasy and ET...luckily teacher didnt ask me to play ET again...then i booked a studio for my MEP prac on 26th sep...the studio with stagea and costs me $15.75 an hour...cos peak hours...then at night when watching tv that time, got a stranger knock on the door very forcefully and trying to open the door...then he was shouting very loudly also...i was very scared...then my father act one lor...go open the door then the person said sry cos wrong house...i thought that person was JASON SIEN lei...now i so scared...todae did my hw...watch tv and maybe going out wif my parents later...then packed my MEP file and i think that we are going to get bak our test paper tml and i dunno how...i screwed up the paper surely die wan lor tml...must do well for prac liao and my EOY...o ya...ytd had a bad dream again...i now really very scared...
be true to urself
3:52 PM
Sunday, September 04, 2005
todae woke up very late...11am...then did some hw...then ate my breakfast cum lunch...i cant eat finish then throw away...my elder brother went to hospital for check up...the doctor say he is stomach swollen then etc...luckily no need operation...i hope i'm not the same prob as him...mine is either my illusion or more complexed...cos he need to go hospital then i had to stay alone at home...my parents 4plus then came home...i practice my organ...i didnt dare to asked my mum abt buying an organ for me...i gave her subtle hints...but no response...forget it...i also noe i'm so lousy...buy le also no diff...then i'm also wondering...if i really had probs wif my health then i would be the one spending the most money among my brothers...then Jason Sien sms again...i ignored him...then i dunno why todae keep on scaring myself...now my heart feel quite pain...and the kidney there...but i think is i think too much le bah...if it's really that pain then i wun be here blogging...
be true to urself
9:43 PM
Friday, September 02, 2005
ytd went to PS cos i haf booked a studio for practicing...costs me $10.50 an hour...it was great cos i get to use the Stagea...and EL-900...there are also other models but as gd as these 2...after that, went to meet Shu Wen, Shu Yun and Eliz...i bought dark choco and biscuit for my 3 meals as i didnt eat yet and even when i reach home...then we waited for Emily and went to play pool...i am so lousy...then abt 6 or 7plus, Leslie, Regan, Mayson, Jun Hong, Jin Hao, Tracy, Joacquim came...they played lan games...then we play until 8 plus went home...then i watch tv until 11pm...did my theory hw until 12plus...todae went back to sch...dunno why i lost my chinese "si han" book...strange...i asked a lot of people they say got hear teacher calling my name when giving out that time...the we get to noe our overall marks...i fail Eng...why isit always Eng that i failed...but nvm...still got end of year to catch up...everyone should also jia you...i felt disappointed cos some of the classmated failed 3 subs then i only fail 1...i think i didnt care abt their concern...i'm so SORRY...i think that my expectations are always very high...however, no matter how much effort i out in, i will nv get gd results...and my parents will nv be gratified...went for theory lesson...i'm elated...luckily my effort out in ytd is not wasted...i spend one hour doing all 8 pages and i need not redo any...todae i haf learned a lot of new things...i would feel jubilant if i had learn somthing new, understand it well and knowing hoe to do...then went to a Jap restuarant wif my parents...ate Tom Yam ramen...so spicy that my gastric hurts when i reach home...but not that pain...i dunno why these days sometimes will get gastric pain then heart pain and my old sickness...ate a ice-cream mooncake...did my theory hw again...
be true to urself
11:56 PM